please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize