I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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