Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
