if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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