There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
and she was petting her beer can
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
