I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
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