I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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