if only i could text you this smell
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
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