Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
i out mim tonsoeep
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