I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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