I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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