Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
