i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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