I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
