we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
