dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
