Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
