I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
