I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
