Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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