She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
