She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
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