just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.