stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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