i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
They have beer where we have blood.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
