Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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