if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
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