Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
