On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
