Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
