Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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