I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
no you cant smoke seaweed
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I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
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It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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