Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...