girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize