He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Come see our sink grown plant.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
you had me at cake vodka
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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