Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
