why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
