I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
