Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Still dying that you shit outside
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
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