Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
