His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
