i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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