Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
