Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
