i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
