Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
