You're my little dorito
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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