My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
my being single is dangerous.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
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