STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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