It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
